A Lesson for TCKs – Everyone Leaves

The experience of living overseas as a child is very different to the experience of living overseas as an adult. The impact of childhood experiences last a lifetime. They are formative experiences – they teach us how the world works. We all internalise ‘lessons’ from our childhood experiences.

TCKs grow up between cultures, learning lessons from more than one cultural viewpoint. Often these messages contradict one another, and learning to navigate this conflict is part of what makes a TCK. The lessons they learn about how the world works, therefore, often come less from individual cultures and more from the fact that they juggle more than one cultural viewpoint. The experience of being “in between” greatly affects their understanding of the world.

As I interviewed hundreds of TCKs there were a lot of repeated themes, and even specific phrases, that became familiar. These were the lessons these TCKs had learned through their childhood experiences. In this post I’m introducing one of the most common lessons of a TCK childhood: Everyone leaves.

Read More | About Misunderstood

Directory of TCK & CCK Blogs & Websites (N to Z)

Expat Bookshop presents the most comprehensive list of TCK and CCK blogs and websites ever! (Part 2).

Expat Bookshop has teamed up with TCKID and Dounia Bertuccelli, the blogger behind Next Stop, to create a comprehensive list of TCK and CCK blogs and websites.

Have we missed anything?

Let Jack know at jack@summertimepublishing.com.

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NEXT STOP: MUSINGS OF A TCK

www.tcknextstop.wordpress.com

Dounia Bertuccelli is a TCK who grew up in Cyprus, USA, Mexico, Philippines, Australia and France. Her blog focuses on her experiences as an Adult Third Culture Kid and growing up as a TCK. Next Stop is an eclectic collection of non-fiction prose, poetry, book reviews and photography.

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PAINTING PICTURES: BLOG SERIES ON THIRD CULTURE KIDS

www.djiboutijones.com/painting-pictures-third-culture-kid-series

Find a list of compelling TCK-related articles compiled (and frequently written) by Rachel Pieh Jones, an expat, author, development worker and mother of three Third Culture Kids. US-born Rachel has lived in Somalia, Kenya, France and Djibouti.

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RAISING TCKS: ONE MOTHER’S JOURNEY…

http://raisingtcks.com/

Originally from the US, MaDonna Maurer and her husband (a German adult TCK) currently live in Asia. She describes her family as the “Fusion Family, for we seem to be fused together by culture, race, and disabilities”.

RESTLESS FINGERS: A WRITING TCK

www.scribblepapers.wordpress.com

This TCK has lived in three countries for at least a year each, and in two others for around six months each. She has family on two continents, and friends across the globe. She is also diabetic (diagnosed at the age of 2). These experiences, and her dad’s challenge to her to start writing short pieces, inspired her to start the blog.

RNG INTERNATIONAL EDUCATIONAL CONSULTANTS (BLOG)

http://rnginternational.com/our-blog/

RNG offers a wide range of educational consulting, from assisting international students with US college admissions to finding the right learning environment for those with learning disabilities. The RNG blog often covers TCK- and CCK-related topics.

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SEA CHANGE MENTORING

http://seachangementoring.com

Their vision is to “provide short-term guidance and professional mentors to third culture, global nomad and expat students in high school and university.”

SILVANA MONDO

http://silvanamondo.com

As a TCK Silvana travelled between Germany, Italy, Thailand and Yugoslavia and finally to America. Her website concentrates on travel between these countries, often relating personal stories but also style, politics and film/arts.

SLURPING SOUP

www.slurpingsoup.com/category/blog/

Blog from Maryam Afnan Ahmad, Cherie Emigh, Ulrike Gemmer, Bárbara Menezes, Kathryn Tonges or Lucinda Willshire, the six co-authors of Slurping Soup and Other Confusions, a collection of real-life stories and related activities for your TCKs.

Read more about the book, Slurping Soup and Other Confusions: True stories and activities to help third culture kids during transition (Summertime Publishing), here.

STUDY ABROAD BLOG, THE

http://thestudyabroadblog.com/

This comprehensive resource includes real-life study abroad stories as well as plenty of support on studying abroad, travelling as a student on a budget, learning a language, and more.

SUMMERTIME PUBLISHING

http://www.summertimepublishing.com/

Summertime Publishing specialises in publishing and republishing books by and for people living abroad with a particular emphasis on third culture kids and issues affecting the global family.

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TAYLOR JOY MURRAY

http://taylorjoymurray.com/

Author of Hidden in My Heart: A TCK’s Journey through Cultural Transition, Taylor Murray has a passion for writing and supporting third culture kids. A TCK herself, Taylor desires to give voice to the unheard life stories of those living abroad and the people who impact them. She lives in Hiroshima, Japan.

TCKID

http://tckid.com/

The TCKid Community is a free forum where you can connect and communicate with TCKids around the world. This active global community also has an educational TV/radio station for TCKs.

TCK DATING

http://tckdating.wordpress.com/

Third culture kids have a multicultural background and yet do not identify fully with a single one. TCK Dating tackles questions like: How do TCKs turn out as adults? How does this translate into dating and relationships? Do they want to date others like them who have an eclectic background and who may understand them better? Can they be happy dating people who have spent their whole life living in one city? How do cultures come into play in dating and longer term relationships?

TCK HACKER

www.tckhacker.wordpress.com

Adult TCK Adam Hacker shares his insights on growing up abroad, travelling and keeping in touch with your global network. His aim is to “promote knowledge of foreign cultures and be a catalyst of growth and change”.

TCK ON A MISSION – TAYO ROCKSON

http://tayorockson.com/blog/

Tayo Rockson is a TCK using his difference to make a difference – and encouraging others to do the same. Includes articles from other TCKs and regular podcasts with TCKs around the globe. Tayo is also the creator of Use Your Difference Media.

TCK TRAINING

http://www.tcktraining.com/

Practical advice for parenting overseas together with the personal reflections of a TCK and Adult TCK. A resource for both parents and those who work with TCKs.

THIRD CULTURE KID LIFE

www.thirdculturekidlife.com

A series of reflections on life as a TCK from content developer, SEO specialist, author, and TCK public speaker James R. Mitchener. Born in England, James has lived in the US, Hong Kong, Singapore and France, spending multiple stints in Hong Kong and America.

THIRD CULTURE LITERATURE

http://thirdcultureliterature.blogspot.com/

This blog defines third culture literature; describes what is distinctive and interesting about it; and discusses third culture authors. Audience: TCKs, CCKs, people who like to read; also literary academics new to third culture studies.

THIRD CULTURE MAMA

www.thirdculturemama.com

Antjie writes about parenting and life as an adult TCK. Antjie was born in Switzerland, has lived most of her life in France, but has also lived in Germany, the UK, Switzerland, China and the United States.

THIRD CULTURE TEACHER

www.thirdcultureteacher.com

Musings on TCK and expat life from an adult TCK turned international teacher of Humanities. Includes posts aimed at teacher and parents too.

THIS.IS.KATHA

https://thisiskatha.com/

Captures Katharina’s general thoughts as well as reflections on the TCK experience and happenings in the TCK world. At the time of publishing, Katharina is a college student who spent a few years in Uganda and South Africa and is now based in Germany.

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VALÉRIE BESANCENEY: A TCK MOTHER TEACHER AUTHOR

www.valeriebesanceney.com

Valérie Besanceney is a quintessential Third Culture Kid (TCK). Originally Dutch, she grew up changing schools and countries four times by the time she had graduated high school. As an adult, she has lived and worked in 10 different countries before finally settling down in Switzerland with her American husband and two young TCK daughters. She hopes to reach out to educators of TCKs, parents of TCKs and TCKs themselves. Valérie is also the author of B at Home, a story about the experiences of a young girl and her teddy bear who have to move (once again).

Read more about the book, B at Home: Emma Moves Again (Summertime Publishing) here on Expat Bookshop.

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WHEN YOU’RE A THIRD CULTURE KID

http://whenyoureathirdculturekid.tumblr.com/

This is a humor blog which includes GIFs and captions. It’s light-hearted and has over 6,000 tumblr followers and over 1,000 Facebook likes.

Find Part 1 (A-M) HERE.

 

Ruth E Van Reken & David C Pollock, Third Culture Kids

The latest edition of “Third Culture Kids: The Experience of Growing Up Among Worlds” (Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2009) by Ruth E Van Reken & David C Pollock shows how the TCK experience is becoming increasingly common and valuable.

Nearly a decade ago, Third Culture Kids: The Experience of Growing Up Among Worlds introduced the concept of and has been the authority on the experiences of “TCKs” – children who grow up or spend a significant part of their childhood living abroad. Early on, TCKs were identified as the rototype “citizen of the future.” That future is now, as more and more children are growing up among worlds, creating a culturally rich and diverse world. Rich with real-life anecdotes, Third Culture Kids, Revised Edition examines the nature of the TCK experience and its effect on maturing, developing a sense of identity and adjusting to one’s “passport country” upon return. For many third culture kids, this book will be their first opportunity to discover that they share a common heritage with countless others around the world. This expanded edition profiles the personal challenges that TCKs experience, from feelings of rootlessness and unresolved grief to struggles with maturity and identity. Highlighting dramatic changes brought about by instant communication and new mobility patterns, the new edition shows how the TCK experience is becoming increasingly common and valuable. The authors also expand the coverage to include “cross-cultural kids,” children of biracial or bicultural parents, immigrants and international adoptees – all of this bringing hidden diversity to our world and challenging our old notions of identity and “home.”

 

 

www.nicholasbrealey.com

www.crossculturalkid.org

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

Ruth Van Reken is a second generation Third Culture Kid* (TCK) and mother of three now adult TCKs and co-author of Third Culture Kids:  Growing Up Among Worlds, rev. ed. (Nicholas Brealey) with David C. Pollock. She is also the author of Letters Never Sent, one of the first books written by an adult TCK examining the impact of his or her cross-cultural childhood. For the last twenty five years, Ruth has traveled extensively to over forty-five countries working with fellow adult TCKs, parents of TCKs, human resource people, educators, and other caregivers, about issues related to global family living.  Currently, Ruth is researching how lessons learned in this TCK context may also apply to other types of cross-cultural childhoods. Ruth is co-founder and past chairperson of the annual Families in Global Transition conference. In addition to her two books and various other articles, she was written  a chapter in Strangers at Home (Aletheia Publications), Unrooted Childhoods (Nicholas Brealey/Intercultural Press), and an upcoming book,  Writing Out of Limbo (Cambridge Scholars Publications).

*a child who spends a significant period of time during his or her developmental years growing up in a culture outside the parents’ culture.

David C. Pollock  is one of the first people to make those who grew up globally to realize they had a name and common connection with others. After living near an international school in Kenya during the 1970’s, Dave realized he was hearing many common themes from the expat children attending that school. He returned to the US and founded Interaction, International to try to be a resource for all organizations who were sending families overseas, hoping to help them deal more effectively with the challenges their children faced so they could use the gifts as well. For many years, Dave circled the globe tirelessly to spread the word of the TCK profile he had developed and the impact of transition on families. Sadly, in April, 2004, he collapsed during once such event in Vienna, Austria and died 9 days later on Easter Sunday.